Friday, January 30, 2009

Jokes: Super Deadly PJs...ekdumm FRESH !! :)

By: Suchi Gupta

 

 

A scientist disconnected his doorbell.......

can u guess why???





????
try



think!!!






donno???
cuz












he wanted to win the No-bell prize!!!!!!!!!!


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ship tha..jisme bahut saare log the...usme ek chor bhi tha..ship iceberg se takra gayi or sab dhub gaye ...sirf chor bacch gaya batao kaise?

รข€¦.
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kyun ki chor ki daadhi me tinka tha..

dhubte hue ko tinka ka sahara mil gaya...

or chor bachh gaya


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Ek Kana Ladka Kisi ladki ko Prapose kare to kaun sa gana Gayega???????






???????????????

















Ek Nazar se bhi Pyar Hota hai Maine suna Hai............................................


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Highly complicated PJ

Q.wat wud an angrez say to his indian naukar who can only understand hindi if he wants him 2 open the door!!

















A."There Was A Cold Day "(say it fast)


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colour of frequency

what is the colour of frequency??









Purple




how ??












frequency ka unit hai Hz
u can write it as 1/sec
ie. par second


in hindi second is also caled as pal
therefore

PARPAL
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Sholay movie mai kis ka double role tha .
?
?
?








King George








how ??
















coin ke dono side rehta hai


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according to movie Sholay who is son of lion.
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HOLI

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how ??
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.Gabbar bolta hai na

holi cub hai
cub hai holi
(cub)

 

 



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URGENT: Help Needed to Save Life of JITM Final Yr Stud

Posted by: "arun pandey" arkpan25@yahoo.com  

Wed Jan 28, 2009 10:30 pm (PST)

Dear
Folks,

Sub: Urgent help Needed for Ailing JITM, Final Yr Student

One of our current JITM, EEE final students (2009
passing) Rajesh Sharma, has been diagnosed with Aplastic Anemia. It is one of
those rare human disorders when the blood formation in the body is negligible
or almost zero. He is presently admitted in AIIMS, Delhi where the doctors have suggested a bone
marrow transplant to cure him.

The transplant costs in India are in the range of 11 Lakhs, which is too much for a middle class family; the college/ students are raising funds to help the family.

Current Status: Currently he is under observation & undergoing a battery of tests and his relatives are being tested for a bone marrow tissue match.
The operation is to be scheduled around 15th Feb .

On behalf of the alumni association of JITM & the final yr studs,
i request you to come forward and extend a quick helping hand in this regard. Keeping up with the prevalent good culture & moral spirit,
Lets make sure the alumni be available to help out when ever such grave
situations arise:

All contributions can be directed to any of the below mentioned A/c:

Rajeev Ranjan (8th sem, +919861480590) 
- A/C No: 406902010592040 (Union Bank, Paralakhemundi Branch, IFSC - UBIN0540692)

Kaushal Ku Arya (8th sem, +919861666767) -
A/C No: 011305041189 (SBI, Paralakhemundi Branch, IFSC - SBIN0000151)

Mukesh Kumar (8th sem,
+919861816196)

# Note1: These A/c are in core
banking & online transfers can be done.

# Note2: Once you transfer the amount. Please send me a confirmation
mail with amount, transferred to a/c details to: help.rajesh.jitm@gmail.com / arkpan25@gmail.com  .This will help keep a track on the total and
to confirm you the receipt of the amount in the account.


For complete details & Reports see: www.jitm.ac. in  
(Rajesh Sharma)               Looking forward to your quick response. Plz
fwd the mail to all JITM Alumni in contact.

Regards

Arun Pandey || 0 99 49 59 59 59 || JITM,
2k-2k4, CSE

'The hands that help are holier than the lips that pray'
- Mother Teressa

 



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Thursday, January 29, 2009

Sweet Thought


Love: A sweet story!!!

By: Amit


A Small Story
A boy and a girl were playing together. The boy had a collection of marbles. The girl had some sweets with her. The boy told the girl that he will give her all his marbles in exchange for her sweets. The girl agreed.

The boy kept the biggest and the most beautiful marble aside and gave the rest to the girl. The girl gave him all her sweets as she had promised.

That night, the girl slept peacefully. But the boy couldn't sleep as he kept wondering if the girl had hidden some sweets from him the way he had hidden his best marble.

Moral of the story: If you don't give your hundred percent in a relationship, you'll always keep doubting if the other person has given his/her hundred percent.. This is applicable for any relationship like love, friendship, employer-employee relationship etc., Give your hundred percent to everything you do and sleep peacefully Picture (Metafile)



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Tuesday, January 27, 2009

2 Minutes to Experience Your Magnetic Mind Power

Your mind is capable of getting exactly what it wants. Many psychologists have called the brain a "goal-seeking mechanism".

Here is a simple exercise to prove to you that your mind does have the quality of a magnet to see what it wants to find. Look at the diagram of a square below.

http://www.mindpowerindia.com/free-articles-all/images/square.gif

The following diagram contains only one square like this square. There are many figures that are close enough, but only one is identical square. Just look at this drawing, and your mind will automatically find the square.

http://www.mindpowerindia.com/free-articles-all/images/magnetic.gif

From now on, have a purpose in mind whenever you read anything. When you have a specific goal, your mind will find it.

It is a good idea to just look through or scan any thing before reading it.

Scanning a page fast

You can scan your study material very fast. It is not reading but more like overview. Just scanning a page brings many key words and elements into your brain/mind (and not all of which is in your awareness, that is, you may not even know that part of your brain has noticed things). Scanning is a great way to revise very rapidly and good for memory.

Friday, January 23, 2009

A paragraph that explains life!

[]


Arthur Ashe, the legendary Wimbledon player was dying of AIDS which he got due to infected blood he received during a heart surgery in 1983.

From world over, he received letters from his fans, one of which conveyed: 'Why does GOD have to select you for such a bad disease'?

To this Arthur Ashe replied:
"
The world over -- 50 million children start playing tennis, 5 million learn to play tennis, 500,000 learn professional tennis, 50,000 come to the circuit, 5000 reach the grand slam, 50 reach Wimbledon, 4 to semi final, 2 to the finals, when I was holding a cup I never asked GOD 'Why me?'.

And today in pain I should not be asking GOD 'Why me?'
"


Happiness keeps you Sweet
Trials keeps you Strong
Sorrow keeps you Human
Failure keeps you humble

And

Success keeps you glowing, but

Only Faith & Attitude Keeps you going...



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Thursday, January 22, 2009

Why some people have all the luck|Worth reading

By: Amruta Dash

 

An interesting insightful read! ..

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/Lifestyle/Spirituality/Speaking_Tree/Why_some_people_have_all_the_luck/articleshow/3896391.cms

Why some people have all the luck

I set out to examine luck, 10 years ago. Why are some people always in the right place at the right time, while others consistently experience ill fortune? I placed advertisements in national newspapers asking for people who felt consistently lucky or unlucky to contact me.

Hundreds of extraordinary men and women volunteered for my research and over the years, have been interviewed by me. I have monitored their lives and had them take part in experiments. The results reveal that although these people have almost no insight into the causes of their luck, their thoughts and behaviour are responsible for much of their good and bad fortune. Take the case of seemingly chance opportunities. Lucky people consistently encounter such opportunities, whereas unlucky people do not.

I carried out a simple experiment to discover whether this was due to differences in their ability to spot such opportunities. I gave both lucky and unlucky people a newspaper, and asked them to look through it and tell me how many photographs were inside. I had secretly placed a large message halfway through the newspaper saying: 'Tell the experimenter you have seen this and win $50'.

This message took up half of the page and was written in type that was more than two inches high. It was staring everyone straight in the face, but the unlucky people tended to miss it and the lucky people tended to spot it.

Unlucky people are generally more tense than lucky people, and this anxiety disrupts their ability to notice the unexpected.

As a result, they miss opportunities because they are too focused on looking for something else. They go to parties intent on finding their perfect partner and so miss opportunities to make good friends. They look through newspapers determined to find certain types of job advertisements and miss other types of jobs.

Lucky people are more relaxed and open, and therefore see what is there rather than just what they are looking for. My research eventually revealed that lucky people generate good fortune via four principles. They are skilled at creating and noticing chance opportunities, make lucky decisions by listening to their intuition, create self-fulfilling prophesies via positive expectations, and adopt a resilient attitude that transforms bad luck into good.

I wondered towards the end of the work, whether these principles could be used to create good luck. I asked a group of volunteers to spend a month carrying out exercises designed to help them think and behave like a lucky person. Dramatic results! These exercises helped them spot chance opportunities, listen to their intuition, expect to be lucky, and be more resilient to bad luck. One month later, the volunteers returned and described what had happened. The results were dramatic: 80 per cent of people were now happier, more satisfied with their lives and, perhaps most important of all, luckier.

The lucky people had become even luckier and the unlucky had become lucky. Finally, i had found the elusive 'luck factor'. Here are four top tips for becoming lucky:

1) Listen to your gut instincts ^ they are normally right.

2) Be open to new experiences and breaking your normal routine.

3) Spend a few moments each day remembering things that went well.

4) Visualise yourself being lucky before an important meeting or telephone call.

Have a Lucky day and work for it.

The happiest people in the world are not those who have no problems, but those who learn to live with things that are less than perfect.

 

The author of `The Luck Factor' teaches at the University of Hertfordshire.

o__
 _> /__
(_) \(_)... Cycle along to a healthier life and cleaner world! :)
 


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Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Investment Lesson ! - Title: What should I do to marry a rich guy?

 

By: Amruta Dash

 

A young and pretty lady posted this on a popular forum:


Title: What should I do to marry a rich guy?

I'm going to be honest of what I'm going to say here. I'm 25 this year. I'm very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k annual salary or above. You might say that I'm greedy, but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New York. My requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income of $500k annual  salary? Are you all married? I wanted to ask: what should I do to marry rich persons like you? Among those I've dated, the richest is $250k annual income, and it seems that this is my upper limit. If someone is going to move into high cost residential area on the west of New York City Garden (?), $250k annual income is not enough.

I'm here humbly to ask a few questions:
 1)      Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names and addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)
 2)      Which age group should I target?
 3)      Why most wives of the riches is only average-looking? I've
met a few girls who doesn't have looks and are not interesting, but they are able to marry rich guys
 4)      How do you decide who can be your wife, and who can only be your girlfriend? (my target now is to get married)

Ms. Pretty


Reply:


Dear Ms. Pretty,

I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out there who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me to analyse  your situation as a professional investor. My annual income is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope everyone believes that I'm  not wasting time here. From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you. The answer is very simple, so let me explain. Put the details aside, what you're trying to do is an exchange of "beauty" and "money": Person A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square. However,  there's a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you can't be prettier year after year. Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It's not just normal depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be much worried  10 years later.

By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a position, dating with you is also a "trading position". If the trade value dropped we will  sell it and it is not a good idea to keep it for long term - same
goes with  the marriage that you wanted. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision any assets with great depreciation value will be  sold or "leased". Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a fool; we  would only date you, but will not marry you. I would advice that you forget looking for any clues to marry a rich guy. And by the way, you could make  yourself to become a rich person with $500k annual income. This has better  chance than finding a rich fool.

Hope this reply helps. If you are interested in "leasing" services, do
contact me…



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Friday, January 16, 2009

Beware !!!

 

By: Siba Gopal

Beware !!!

 

IF SOME ONE ASKS YOU TO DIAL #09 or #90, Please Do Not Dial This When Asked, Please circulate URGENTLY. New Trick of Terrorists to Frame Innocent People! If you receive a phone call on your Mobile from any person saying that they're checking your mobile line, and you have to press #90 or #09 or any other number.. End this call immediately without pressing any numbers. Friends there is a fraud company using a device that once you press #90 or #09 they can access your SIM card and make calls at your expense. Forward this message to as many friends as u can, to stop it. This information has been confirmed by both Motorola and Nokia. There are over 3 million affected mobile phones. You can check this news at CNN web site also.

 



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Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Nice One Must Read : who gave life to more than 50000 employees: Satyam: Otherside of the coin


Such  a wonderful  gesture
   

A Message from unknown Satyamite



Dear all of my Satyamites,

Yesterday will be a memorable day to us throughout our life. Little bit of business & human nature knowledge is forcing me to write few of my thoughts (Please ignore them if they doesn't make any sense). Ask yourself who is worst affected by all this mayhem. Is it u & me (employees), Govt or Satyam & Ramalingaraju ?. My conviction says that employees of any MNC are associated to that company as long as they don't have any better option, the best thing government can do for a company is to keep itself away from it. But there was a visionary who created wealth for a nation for 20 years, the only thing that cannot be separated from Satyam for these 20 years & ahead also if Satyam remains was\is a name called "Ramalinga Raju". Fortunately I got some 15 min of time talking to him when i was an ELTP. He's much softer then we see him. Imagine what would be going on in his mind when he was writing yesterday's letter accepting all the things which he did only to save his company. All have made him scapegoat for what has happened & left the company keeping their integrity intact. He was cursed badly for putting the money of a public limited company into his family driven company but it only now clear that how he was transferrring the risk from 50,000 people to his two sons & his known-integrity.
The worst which can happen to we the employees is that we are out of our current job, jobless for time being & then again getting a job which we deserve & our families will be worried for us(as they are always). But a relatively bitter truth will be for the Raju-family who will be annoyed for ages & will be treated as miscreants by those who do not know the truth or more about Greedy investors & money market. And the truth is that he has not stolen some thousand crores rupees into his own pocket, it was a bubble he created which busted. (And every other company on earth does so, being wary of not getting trapped)

One more thing which annoys me is does a philanthropist guy deserve this disgraceful exit ? I really feel sad about the way he's been portrait in the media. Our rustic fellows have already started comparing him with Harshad Mehta. Tell me any incident in corporate India where any chairman has dared to confess such irregularities in his own firm. And believe me it takes hell lot of guts to accept all this publicly. And as I read the news today morning it was published there that even his community members have suggested him not to tell anything and later on he can play with the Indian laws as every politician does in India. But as he mentioned it was all deep regret in his conscience which lead him to confess all this.
I am not at all saying that he's totally innocent and unaware of what's been going there but a person who has started a journey called Satyam 20 yrs ago with few associates and made it 4th largest IT Company in India, done all this for sake of his 50000 Satyam family members. In the end i'll ask only one question to all of my friends," for whom he has created this bubble, if it was he who was going bankrupt? "
The day before all this mayhem started, we all were proud to be called as Satyamites and were wearing the Satyam tag displaying our esteem to others, and now due to a single incidence u are feeling awkward to show the same Satyam tag in public?? I don't know about others, but still I am proud to be a SATYAMITE!!!

 



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Friday, January 9, 2009

TOWARDS BETTER HEALTH - Obesity Guidelines for India.

OBESITY GUIDELINES FOR INDIA

The Health Ministry along with the Diabetes Foundation of India and 20 other national health organisations has released the first India-specific guidelines in November 2008, for prevention and management of obesity and metabolic syndrome.

New Guidelines -

  • Overweight - if your BMI is 23 or more. The international standard is 25.
  • Obese - if your BMI is 25 or more. The international standard is 30.
  • An Indian qualifies for bariatric surgery for obesity if the BMI is 32.5 as opposed to 35 for international patients.
  • Waist circumference indicating abdominal obesity - Men > 90 cm (as opposed to 102 cm as per international guidelines); Women > 80 cm (as opposed to 88 cm as per international guidelines)

Experts say that 6-8 crore Indians will benefit from the new guidelines because it will help to prevent greater numbers of diabetes and cardiovascular diseases. So, include weight management in your new year resolution list, for better health!

Thursday, January 8, 2009

G'morning ... have a nice day : Good Quote

 

There is nothing love cannot face;

there is no limit to its faith, its hope, and its endurance.

- Bible, I Corinthians 13:7

 



The information contained in this message may be confidential and legally protected under applicable law. The message is intended solely for the addressee(s). If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that any use, forwarding, dissemination, or reproduction of this message is strictly prohibited and may be unlawful. If you are not the intended recipient, please contact the sender by return e-mail and destroy all copies of the original message.

Monday, January 5, 2009

MELAMINE (Read to the end) - Products from China

By: Siba Gopal

Dear Friends

Sharing with you this article and have a great and healthy 2009

Roger Toh


Make sure you read to

the very end ห† very

interesting ห† perhaps

the best way to tell

where things are

made.


China milk poisoning incidents make
everyone afraid to look at the daily news report.
Everyday, the reports are changing. No one can clearly tell us what to eat and what not to eat.

1.What really is poisoned milk?

It is milk powder mixed with 'MELAMINE'

What is Melamine used for?
It is an industrial chemical used in the production of melawares.


It is also used in home decor - i.e.kitchens.

We all MUST understand that Melamine is used in INDUSTRIAL PRODUCTION - - - - - it CANNOT be eaten. 2.Why is Melamine added to milk powder?

The most important nutrient in milk is protein. And, Melamine has this same protein that contains 'NITROGEN'

Adding Melamine into milk reduces the actual milk content required, and therefore it is cheaper than all milk. So it lowers the capital required in the production of milk products. Therefore it earns the business man more profit!

Below is Melamine; doesn't it look like milk / milk
powder?
It doesn't have any smell, so cannot be detected.

3.When was it discovered that it had been added to milk products?

In 2007, US cats and dogs died suddenly. It was found that their pet food from China contained Melamine.

Early in 2008, in China , an abnormal increase in infant cases of kidney stones was reported.


In August 2008, China Sanlu Milk Powder tested positive for Melamine

Error! Filename not specified.

Sept. 2008, the New Zealand government asked China to investigate this problem
Sept. 21, 2008, they found that many food products in Taiwan tested for Melamine


4.What happens when Melamine ingested and digested?

Melamine remains inside the kidneys. It forms into stones blocking the tubes.
Pain will be imminent and the person cannot urinate. Kidney(s) will then swell.

Although surgery can remove the stones, it may cause irreversible kidney damage.
It can lead to the loss of kidney function, which will require on-going kidney dialysis; or lead to death
because of uremia.

What is dialysis? In fact, it should be called 'blood washing'; it is filtering all of the body's blood into
a machine and then returning the blood back to the body.

A dialysis machine

The whole process takes 4 hours; and it is necessary to have dialysis once every 3 days for the rest of your life.

Below: A dialysis center


Why is the contamination much more serious in babies? A baby's kidneys are so very small and they drink a lot of milk powder.

China currenty has 13,000 infants hospitalized

It does not matter how much Melamine a human being ingested (ate) (took). The important point is:
'MELAMINE CANNOT BE EATEN!'


5.What foods are to be avoided?

Foods from China that contain dairy products should be avoided.

Remember:
Anything chinese-looking and milky/creamy (as above)
Also
6.Which companies are affected?

Hereunder are the companies affected with Melamine. ---------------------------------------------------------


7.What do we do next?

Avoid the above foods for at least six months.

If you own or operate a snack bar, a restaurant, or a coffee shops, etc., stop selling dairy products for the meantime.

If you have infants at home, change to mother's milk or find other substitutes.

Finally, share this information with friends so they will understand the risk of milk poisoning.


The whole world needs to know of "Made In China" 'black-hearted' goods. Do you know how to tell which products are made in the USA , or in the Philippines , in Taiwan, or in China ? Here's How: The first 3 digits of the barcodeidentify the country code wherein the product was made.

For Example: ALL barcodes that start with 690, 691, 692, etc. up to and including 695 are all MADE IN CHINA.
Barcodes starting with 471 are on products Made in Taiwan.



Taiwanese barcode

You have a right to know. But government and related departments
never inform or educate the public. Therefore we must educate ourselves, be vigilant, and RESCUE ourselves.

Today, Chinese businessmen know that consumers will not select products 'Made in China'. So, they make every effort not to show or state the country of origin on their products. However, you can now refer to the barcode. DO remember if the first 3 digits are one of those between 690 and 695 inclusive then it is a product Made in China . OTHER BARCODES:
00 ~ 13 USA & CANADA
30 ~ 37 FRANCE
40 ~ 44 GERMANY
49 ~ JAPAN
50 ~ UK
57 ~ Denmark
64 ~ Finland
76 ~ Switzerland and Liechtenstein
628 ~ Saudi-Arabia
629 ~ United Arab Emirates
740 ~ 745 - Central America


All 480 Codes are Made in the Philippines.

Please inform your family and friends. Be aware! And help others to be aware!



 
doggy steps
doggy steps